a solo show within the MFA studio space

in conjunction with daapworks - University of Cincinnati

April 23 - June 27 2024

(material list & work statement further down)

Zemblanity: is the opposite of serendipity. Meaning that it is an unlucky or unwanted, but predictable, event. The inexorability of unfortunate discoveries.
It is also the title of the 18ft drawing below and in the video. The work is crayola, sharpie and water on raw canvas.
In short, it represents the fight for attention.
Here we see a curated collection of contradictory images. Memes, memories, genocide and selfies all compete for the foreground.

i’m gonna start with a rant: it is absolutely infuriating tragedy to me - the lack of zeal WE THE PEOPLE show to advocate for, and vindicate ourselves in our daily lives. Rampant ennui. i just learned this word - good word. The fact that children can be targeted and used as pawns their entire life, and then discarded as broken adults is the reason why we must stop procreating. My work? It’s not about my name. It’s about skills over income. It's about community over "ur network is ur net worth". It’s about answering the daily call to action. It's about pulling grief out from the masses of pretense and decorum. i want to weep with you. This work that i’m doing, this long ass drawing, is just line because the subject matter is so dense. i do not want anyone to be distracted by any other technique, texture, material, or to further burden the work with extra cruft of concept. i think it’s a heartbreaking atrocity the way most men have turned out in America; from apathetic politicians to depressed housedads to drug abusing rapists and pedophiles to corrupt, boring, functioning working class with way too much overlap in between. i can’t stomach most of the work of my peers. The work is so damn shallow, making pretty (or ugly) little shit doing silly little things in hopes of selling them off to silly rich people and using said silly sales to boost esteem & personal value in hopes of "securing a future" which is literally an insane fallacy. What dull tedium. i see too many, myself included, demanding the world to let you catch your breath while BILLIONS suffocate each second. i think it’s fu****king weird - this balance that we seek when everything is so clearly out of balance. Why is your satisfaction, our peace, my mental health, why is it more valued? i understand that rest is resistance in a culture that denies you rest and makes you feel like the whole worlds problems are yours to solve but at the end of the day - aren’t they? i know that nothing good comes from being burnt out and that you can’t give from an empty well, but so many of us walk around with full Camelbacks bitching about drought. i am complicit AND i will rob Kroger. i am complicit AND i want funding. I DO NOT NEED TO BE REASONABLE. Every Christmas, my core family celebrates a Palestinian baby with a birthday cake, on the same day my Uncle, the longstanding head of house, tells the family he would gladly drop a nuke on the entire Middle East. We know my uncle IS a good man. The celebrated Palestinian baby of which i speak goes by the name of Jesus. Cognitive dissonance is absolutely fascinating. Additionally, i’m just not satisfied with people thinking they have to follow policy in order to be honorable and humble and at the same time they spend their entire life, like my mom, trying to change and be a positive affect in these broken systems, no scratch that. They’re not broken, they were purposely built to be oppressive, depressive and repressive. Today, in Cincinnati, a little girl who’s been trafficked from the age of 4 to 17 ran away from this residential facility after grooming another 14y/o and they were trafficked for a week and the cops know who did it but won’t make arrests because they’re arguing about jurisdiction. The 14 y/o is on my sisters case load and Sis broke policy to hunt down this girl and rescue her. The director is infuriated because this was against social worker policy. To rescue a child from anal rape by 30 year old men and forced meth use. She didn’t eat for 5 days. The cops KNOW this man from MANY cases and "CANT ARREST HIM BC THEY DONT KNOW WHICH JURISDICTION THE ACTUAL TRAFFICKING CRIMES ARE ACTUALLY TAKING PLACE IN". Because the GIRLS R TOO DOPED UP TO KNOW WHERE THEY ARE, IT DOES NOT MATTER THAT THEY HAVE HIS DNA AND 15 OTHER MEN (LITERALLY) INSIDE THEM AND THEY KNOW HIS FULL FUCKING NAME. YES THIS IS VERBATIM, IN EVERY WAY, WHAT HAPPENED. YES THANK YOU COPS! WOOHOO LEGAL SYSTEM! The director of the residential facility where Sis works knowingly, against EVERY case manager and counselors advice ON PAPER, allowed a danger to her kids into the residential facility because she gets a bigger check for taking in specific victims. None of the staff have any of the legally required training to handle or work with anyone involved in sex trafficking. The check the state gave her for the girl whos been raped since 4, will provide the director's and the executive boards yearly bonus. Sisters bonus was a $50 Kroger gift card. She works with the kids no less than 60 hours a week. They've never met the kids. They don't know any of the staff in person and only the director has any formal education in social work. Did you know in 33 states it’s legal for a cop to rape anyone in their custody? They simply have to file a form saying it was consensual and the rape is legally sound - regardless of the detainees statement. Did you know the US Federal Government spent $776 Billion of OUR tax dollars on the Department of Defense in 2023 alone? The whole block saw a 9, nine, year old arrested, booked and detained for running away into the woods because he demanded alone time. In This UnitedFUCKINGStates. i’m not worried about being the most important voice in the room. i’m not worried about legacy. i’m not worried about anything other than my impact & the ramifications. i am responsible for my ripples. i am responsible for my knowledge. i pray you think of babies dying and you go barren. i pray you think of all the brokenhearted mothers of murdered babies and it makes you cherish your seed. i pray you think of all the human trafficked bodies and it makes you seethe and scorn sex. i pray you think of all the repressed bodies forced to mutate themselves into acquiescence and it makes you wildly sexually liberated. i pray you look at all the wasted land and you appreciate your air. i pray you burn your home in favor of the ashes. i pray you build your home out of respect for the ashes. i pray every time you eat a carcass you feel your own flesh tearing. i pray every time you eat a plant you feel your own flesh tearing. i pray every sip of water makes you grateful for the itch. i pray every itch encourages you to scratch your neighbor. i pray you see your neighbor and you see a lover. i pray you see your lover and you SEE them.


here's ur dang color theory:
Blue = the way the patriarchy has failed men. To me, this is the root of all evil.
Pink = the way that women labeled bodies are treated in all systems.
Green = all Eco injustice and abuse.
Yellow = a silly.
Red = housing, red lining, the filthy perversion of American domestic and foreign policy.
Purple = the overlap of blue & red.
Brown = things that where once clear and are muddy now.
Orange = things i’ve seen that fill me with a word that's best embodied by The Joker.
Black/Grey = everything that can’t be undone.